Massage for the LGBTQIA+ Community (2024)

I’m not exaggerating when I tell you that this brought tears to my eyes.

Most people picture massage therapists as a bunch of ‘yoga-practicing hippies’ into ‘chakras, auras, and the energy of the Universe.’

And while that stereotype definitely has some hints of truth to it, we are humans who are prone to the same prejudices, religious beliefs, and ignorance as any other.

And this simple conversation had just opened my eyes to an ignorance of my own.

And yet, the anxiety, fear of rejection, and discrimination suffered by the transgendered community when it comes to self care had not occurred to me.

Sure, I have sought out physicians who are either gay, or at least gay friendly for my own health care. But as a cis-gendered white male who uses He/Him pronouns, the fact that there are massage therapists who would not “feel comfortable” treating a trans client never came to mind.

Now that I’m back in my hometown of Kansas City, in the heart of the “Bible Belt,” I know that I have to be a bit more careful and vigilant when out in public.

The city has changed a lot in the nearly 25 years that I lived in California, but it still has tons of room for growth in the area of tolerance and acceptance.

Clearly, the massage profession has room to grow as well.

It became apparent that there is a thin line between “being an ally” and “pandering.”

It’s also important to make a clear distinction between being inclusive and misrepresenting myself as a part of a sub-community to which I don’t belong.

In other words, I want to let my clients and potential clients know that mine is a safe, judgment-free, hate-free massage practice without leading anyone to believe that I am trans myself. I’m not worried about what others may think about my masculinity or lack thereof. I worry about causing confusion or offense to someone who is in the transgendered community.

I have plenty of heterosexual clients. I suspect that I have plenty of clients who would rather not know about my orientation or are downright hostile about it. Though, honestly, I have had years of practice at sniffing out hom*ophobia and have no trouble firing a client who reeks of it.

All of this droning on about the LGBTQIA+ community and how it relates to massage has nothing whatsoever to do with sex or who is having it with whom. And as I have had to repeat many, many times:Massage Therapy is not sex work.

This droning on is about the very real and specific needs that a member of this community has.

Needs that include:

• Emotional and Spiritual
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Body Dysmorphia
  • Fear of/Lack of Intimacy
  • PTSD
  • Feelings of Shame/Unworthiness
• Physical
  • Post-Surgical Lymphatic Drainage
  • Post-Surgical Scar Intervention
  • Traumatic Injury Rehabilitation
  • Stress Relief

These are all issues for which massage therapy has been repeatedly demonstrated as an effective treatment.

It’s past time for massage professionals to open their practices to the LGBTQIA+ tribe.

So if you have found this article while googling “trans friendly massage” or “gay massage therapist” or whatever terms brought you here, welcome. I hope you find my massage practice to be a safe environment to receive treatment.

I look forward to working with you.

TheLGBTQIA Resource Center at UC Davisis a fantastic site for educating yourself oncommon terminologyand ways to get involved in the community.

The Trevor Projectis non-profit organization dedicated to supporting LGBTQIA+ youth, specifically targeting suicide prevention. They have an excellentGuide to Being an Ally to Transgender and Nonbinary Youth.

“LGBTQ+ Elder Health Care Guide” to connect older adults in the LGBTQ+ community to the resources and information that will help them find the care they need